Creationism Vs. Evolution: The Arguments For Each Side | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

The question of whether life was intelligently designed or evolved over billions of years has been a major point of contention since Darwin’s On The Origin Of Species was first published in the mid-19th century. Here are the strongest arguments from each side of this ongoing and heated debate:

CREATIONISM

Evolutionary theory rests on precepts set out by old, obsolete book written over a hundred years ago
Scientifically corroborated by numerous peer-reviewed Facebook posts
Banana flawlessly designed for use as fake phone
Bible verses about molecular mutation and generational metamorphosis in allele frequencies clearly allegorical
Nine electoral votes in Alabama
Results of natural selection experiments have only been reproduced a few thousand times in a laboratory
Archaeopteryx way too awesome to have evolved into shitty birds of today Far easier to understand than evolution

EVOLUTION

Personal feud with God
Saw frog evolve from pollywog
Distinct morphological similarities between ancient Neanderthal and Trent
Nice to think we actually distantly related to family dog
Want to see how much more upright next figure in evolutionary chart will be standing
That one Star Trek: Voyager episode where helmsman Tom Paris goes through rapid evolution
Dazzling oratorical genius of Clarence Darrow
Universe was created out of nothing billions of years ago, which you’ll just have to trust us on

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Matt Taibbi: America Has A 'Profound Hatred Of The Weak And The Poor'

Living in America has taught Matt Taibbi that we as a society have “a profound hatred of the weak and the poor.”

That’s one claim the former Rolling Stone writer makes in his new book, “The Divide: American Injustice in the Age of the Wealth Gap.” Taibbi defended this statement in a HuffPost Live interview on Tuesday.

"Any American understands that there’s this tremendous pressure to succeed and we think about people, for instance, who are on the welfare system and we think of them without compassion," he told host Alyona Minkovski. "We think of them as unsympathetic characters because they’re somehow taking from us and, meanwhile, there’s this incredible adulation and worship for people who make money."

Taibbi came to this realization after witnessing the discrepancy in treatment of white-collar versus blue-collar defendants in the court room, he said.

"If a poor person without means comes into a court room, the judge doesn’t want to hear anything that the defense attorney has to say for that person," he explained.

"Whereas when I went to watch these white-collar cases," Taibbi continued, "there’s almost an admiration that you see when the judges talk to the lawyers of the white-collar defendants."

Watch Matt Taibbi’s full HuffPost Live interview here.

The US is an oligarchy, study concludes - Telegraph

The US government does not represent the interests of the majority of the country’s citizens, but is instead ruled by those of the rich and powerful, a new study from Princeton and Northwestern Universities has concluded.

The report, entitled Testing Theories of American Politics: Elites, Interest Groups, and Average Citizens, used extensive policy data collected from between the years of 1981 and 2002 to empirically determine the state of the US political system.

After sifting through nearly 1,800 US policies enacted in that period and comparing them to the expressed preferences of average Americans (50th percentile of income), affluent Americans (90th percentile) and large special interests groups, researchers concluded that the United States is dominated by its economic elite.

The peer-reviewed study, which will be taught at these universities in September, says: “The central point that emerges from our research is that economic elites and organised groups representing business interests have substantial independent impacts on US government policy, while mass-based interest groups and average citizens have little or no independent influence.”

Researchers concluded that US government policies rarely align with the the preferences of the majority of Americans, but do favour special interests and lobbying oragnisations: “When a majority of citizens disagrees with economic elites and/or with organised interests, they generally lose. Moreover, because of the strong status quo bias built into the US political system, even when fairly large majorities of Americans favour policy change, they generally do not get it.”

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